I’ve been in physical therapy for six months now for Achilles tendonitis. The good news is that I’ve recently graduated from twice-per-week sessions to once-per-week. (Yay!)
In between appointments, I have a series of exercises I do at home to help build strength and increase flexibility in my feet, ankles, and legs. One of things I do is a series of strengthening exercises using a resistance band (shown in the photo above), which is a stretchy strap, sort of like a huge rubber band.
Most of my exercises involve the posture shown to the right, where I have the band stretched around one foot and I’m holding the ends of the band taut while I move my foot in different directions. I’ve done these exercises hundreds of times in recent months, all without incident.
Until recently.
This past weekend, I was doing my exercises, carefully focusing on form and all that when something (I don’t know what) happened and the band slipped off my foot…
… and smacked me right in the eye, just like a rubber band. A very large, strong, painful rubber band.
I was so stunned that I couldn’t even move, just hold my hands to my face and ask Pete to bring me an ice pack STAT.
Surprisingly, my eye was neither black nor puffy afterward, although we were expecting it.
I think, going forward, I might need safety goggles. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s that I have crazy-strong clutz skills and weird accidents seem to happen to me.
Come on, make me feel better: Surely some of you have had some crazy pratfalls and near-blindings too, right?
I once did a cartwheel kind of thing over the open dishwasher door. The two family observers, Rob and Emma, were both so amazed that I didn’t actually fall to the floor that they just stood there with their mouths open.
I am still using a band too, but I use it to walk sideways to strengthen those side muscles. And I do it in the pool, so if I fall down, it’s a nice gentle fall.
Damn Cassi, I can’t even imagine how you managed that feat.
I must tell you about the time my mum sling shotted herself into her closet across the room using those gigantic workout rubber bands.
True story.
The famous face-plant in front of the meat market when I tripped over the front of my flip-flops and broke my nose and cut my forehead. That was almost 4 years ago and it still hurts the bridge of my nose when I wear my glasses for too long.
One day, I’m going to have to explain a black eye with “I walked into a door” and no one will believe me because it’s such a culturally accepted euphemism for domestic abuse, but it will be TRUE. I walk into doors on an almost weekly basis. I get shoulder bruises regularly. My toenails are also often rough because I accidentally break them by stubbing my toes on everything remotely near me. I fall off of curbs. I fall off of shoes. I trip over thin air. I drop things constantly - the other day my husband accused me (lovingly, jokingly) of doing a Mr. Bean routine because I literally dropped everything I picked up for 3 or 4 minutes straight, sometimes several times in a row. I once gave myself a concussion just getting into my car - I hit my head on the car so hard that I blacked out for a second and then saw actual stars. My husband made me switch seats so he could drive home, he was so concerned about my mental capacity after that blow. (Hopefully my fellow klutziness is making you feel better…)
It’s like we’re double twins — our name and our clumsiness. Seriously, you’ve just described several incidents from my own life.
I’m always bumping into something and bruising myself.
OUCH! Exercise can be so hazardous. Especially extreme sports like BANDING.
I once had a job as a counselor of sorts, working with kids of all ages and teaching them about good decision-making and healthy choices, avoiding drugs, etc. I spent time with them in various settings, classes, groups, and lunch. One day it was time for recess, and they were planning a race down a huge hill to where the playground equipment was located. I must have had some momentary brain paralysis as I decided to race with them to the playground, and boy were they excited. When someone said go, I ran my heart out, down the hill. Unfortunately the top part of my body was heavier and flew down the hill faster than my legs could carry me. I ended up falling and rolling down the hill as the kids slowed to watch their adult mentor make a total fool of himself in front of the whole 3rd grade. Thankfully nothing on my body was broken, just scratched up and dirty. It was so embarrassing, trying to be cool and ending up looking stupid. But they loved it. So I guess it was worth it in the end.
Last May, I caught the toe of my shoe on the curb as I was stepping up after crossing the street. I fell straight over, completely down, and somehow ended up with my hand underneath my body. Didn’t bruise anything or even skin my knees or my other hand, but I broke my pinkie. Had to have surgery a week later, resulting in 2 pins, weeks in a cast, and a couple months of physical therapy. I was leaving a baseball game so I call it my baseball injury.
Then there was the time I was walking back to work after having lunch with a couple of friends. The friend in front of me started walking on the curb (there’s a theme here…) like a balance beam. I did, too, but I didn’t keep my eyes on my feet. I stepped half on the curb and half on…air. Rolled my foot, and landed in a heap. Broke a bone in my foot and damaged cartilage. It took 3 operations, 4 pins, a total of 20 weeks non-weightbearing, and countless hours of PT over the course of two years to make it all better.
Sen. Harry Reid recently injured his eye using an exercise band,too. http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-politics/wp/2015/01/09/harry-reid-describes-exercise-injuries-doesnt-rule-out-losing-sight-in-his-right-eye/
And there’s the time my inner 12 yr old boy came out and I kicked what I thought was a piece of ice left on the sidewalk only to find out it was frozen on the sidewalk. Did a face plant to the snow with bag, glasses, key and phone going in all directions. Only my dignity was hurt and this was a very good thing as it was late and I was the last one to leave the office that night.
Glad you are okay.
I’ve had the band smack me in several places but never (yet) in the eye. Ouch!
However, while exercising I have been known to pass out while using the slide-board (back and forth, speed skater motion) and wake up on the floor, confused and laughing… I learned to not do such a thing at six o’clock in the morning. I’ve fallen off an elliptical trainer (cheap home version is not as stable as expensive gym version). But the worst damage I’ve done is to walk quickly through my living room and smack my toes very hard against the foot of the recliner. I had to wear a “boot” for a month… in August… in Texas. It wasn’t pretty — it was sweaty.
Feeling better yet?
I’m glad you escaped getting a black eye!
My life is a series of pratfalls and crazy injuries. Among the most bizarre and embarrassing - the time I fell off my front porch (I was just standing there! Really!) and in my landing, managed to scrape all the skin off my hands and knees. And chin.
This was not that long ago either.
Oh, I adore you and your readers. I routinely bang the top of my head on the door frame of my car. And I.Don’t.Know.Why! It doesn’t happen every time, but at least once a week. You’d think I’d learn… I’m also routinely covered in bruises that I have no recollection of just what I did to deserve. I blame my husband for most. He notoriously leaves cabinet doors/drawers open so I turn around and bang into them. Unfortunately he also seems to be a great teacher as now I’m having to harp on my kids to close the dang door/drawer when they’re done as well!