MomBabe has written a very funny (and also very true) post about the Top 10 Items a New Mother Needs. One of the items on the list reminded me of a story from when Graceful was born.
For a variety of reasons that I’m not going to get into right now, Graceful was not breastfed.
Unfortunately, all the parenting books I was reading skewed toward breastfeeding and not bottlefeeding. And, all of my friends breastfed too.
So it turns out that, when my child came into the world, I was lacking some really important information about one particular matter.
The baby was born on a Tuesday and we brought her home the next day. By that point, I was already sleep deprived, having not slept during labor on Monday night and then not at all on Tuesday or Tuesday night due to the World’s Worst Hospital Roommate.
Our first night home, Wednesday, I was too keyed up to sleep. So I didn’t. Maybe an hour or two.
On Thursday night, it was more of the same. I just couldn’t go to sleep.
By Friday night, I was a mess, having slept only a couple of hours each night since Sunday.
On Saturday morning, I woke up and discovered that my milk had come in — in fact, it was rather difficult not to notice the large puddle in our bed. I was not at all prepared for this new development and therefore, I had none of these:
Yes, that’s right. No one had told me that, breastfeeding or not, my milk would come in regardless and that it would be a LOT and that it would be MESSY.
What was I going to do? I couldn’t go through the day leaking and spraying and squirting milk like an out of control cow. Somehow, in my addled sleep-deprived state, I came up with what I thought was an ingenious solution:
I cut one in half, put a piece on each side and went about my day.
It was only that night that I realized where I had gone wrong.
I put them in backwards. As in, the sticky side was attached to ME.
Removing them was not exactly fun. Actually, it sucked more than I would have thought possible.
Since then, whenever I talk to an expectant first-time mother, I always share one piece of advice: Buy nursing pads, even if you think you won’t need them.
`
And ouch when the tanks are full.
Graceful was a beautiful baby!
Funny story but even more than that, gorgeous pics!
Hey – Kotex are a good solution for a good number of things. I am kinda aware of both the possibilities of boob and getting ready.
I had the same issue. I wasn’t able to breastfeed, but not for a lack of milk. There were two weeks of painful messiness, and I couldn’t find info ANYWHERE on how to stop my milk.
LOL!!!! I should have tried the Kotex! I only breastfed for a few short weeks and I used those nursing pads and kept leaking through them.
Okay, the fact that you said “sucked” in a tale about breastfeeding just cracked me up. Your poor childbirth-addled brain had the right instincts…
Oh goodness! What a great story! I don’t think I ever would have thought of the kotex…
I hated those Lansinoh disposable pads. If I was gonna leak, those things wouldn’t stop the mess, just slow it down for a couple seconds. i found some great re-usable ones that were extra thick plus a padded nursing bra was my only salvation. : ) Where does all that milk come from?!? (I nursed the boy for over 9 months before the milk gave up. Too much travel time. I wish I’d started pumping from day 1. I’d probably have had enough milk to last over a year!)
Oh my. Ouch. I once put a Swiffer pad on the Swiffer wet-floor cleaner upside down and then wondered why it didn’t work worth a crap, does that count?
Good instincts with the kotex. I found that the nursing pads didn’t absorb worth a damn. I’d be out grocery shopping, with Leah in her carrier, and either she or some other random baby in the store would cry, and my milk would let down. I’d be OK for the 30 seconds it took the nursing pads to absorb to capacity, and then I’d get wet leak marks down my shirt, starting at where the bottom border of the pad was. Kotex might be bulky, but I bet they’re more absorbent.
Grace was a lovely baby, it’s easy to see how she grew into such a gorgeous girl.
Tuesday’s child is full of grace… wondering if that has anything to do with her name.
OUCH is all I can say.
Jen, poor you! Ouch!
I think that’s pretty genius! I mean, except for sticking them to your boobs!
I don’t have kids, but thankfully I have friends who LIKE TO SHARE and my one mom friend, who didn’t breastfeed, told me all about the milk coming in and the pain and something about sticking cabbage leaves in her bra.
And that’s when I stopped paying attention.
Such cute baby photos!
Such a lovely baby – and while I’m sorry for your poor ouchie! breasts, that is a VERY funny story.
My breasts are hurting from the memories in my brain that you just poked.
I fully understand why sleep deprivation works as a form of torture.
I can’t help but to giggle a little here. The pads were a good idea even if put on backwards and I agree, there is huge pressure to breast feed. While I realize it’s better for the baby, I think it should be an individual decision.
And you would never know that beautiful baby/now girl is smart and wonderful and healthy and to think she was not breastfed!
The breast bottle controversy is always a battle I am shocked about! Who cares how a baby is nurished, they are being fed and loved and growing and healthy!
She was so stinking cute! I love pudgy little babies. That last picture is my favorite!
Oh, too funny. (I chose not to breastfeed my first child, and one would think I’d opted to beat him instead.) Thanks for sharing.
I. Hate. Breastfeeding.
The end.
But did they work?
The one thing I always tell expectant moms that no one told me –
Tucks Pads.
‘Nuff said.
BAHAHHAHA. That is an awesome story.
And I’m so glad to hear of a story about a bottlefed baby who is now an amazing little girl. I couldn’t breastfeed Toby and from all the flack I got (which admittedly might have been imagined) you’d think I was depriving him of air or something.
Looking back, thank God I didn’t breastfeed, because this kid never. stops. eating. And he bites hard too.
Firstly, I thought I had “the World’s Worst Hospital Roommate” (there was “the screamer”. I got that epidural because I was so tired of listening to her; then I had a perfectly reasonable room mate. It was the nursing staff that were nuts. Who needs to bathe a baby at 2:30 in the morning? Didn’t any one tell you I had 20 hours of labor and had been up for 10 hours before that?!)
Secondly – I recommend face clothes. Kind of gave me the Madonna look in all the wrong places – they are handy and quick to replace, and in a pinch, can be rinsed out to wipe gummy hands or faces!
LMAO. I can only imagine. Thanks for the advice (for future reference)
Since it happened long ago, I think it’s OK to say how funny this story is!!! You may have been sleep deprived buy you still managed to “pull a MacGyver”!!!!